1月19日 okay day
Today was full of mixed feelings for a day that was supposed to be relaxing. I went to the mall with my cousins and bought a cute swimwear that fit me well. I'm glad I could find one I liked. I'm starting to enjoy looking at myself in the mirror, and that makes me really happy. I feel like I still dress too comfortably and I should start trying out more styles but we're taking babysteps, I shouldn't pressure myself to look my best when I'm only starting to accept my appearance as it is.
Today's activity got me really tired to the point where I couldn't keep my eyes open during the ride home. Thankfully my aunt gave me a ride cause I wouldn't have come out alive of the public transport if I fell asleep so late in the night.
When I got home, I found out that my brother had eaten the European cookies I saved for my mom earlier and that just ruined my day completely. I feel like I sound too dramatic when telling this but it still makes me angry and I'm typing all of this again with tears in my eyes. To anyone reading this: If you live in a shared space PLEASE always ask before taking something unless the other person has directly told you to not worry about that. Especially when it's food. Sorry if I keep making a huge deal about this but I'm tired and it really meant a lot to me that my mother tried those cookies... Now she won't be able to try them again until God-knows-when because a trip to Europe isn't something you plan so casually lol.
I already had the chance to talk about this with my friends and I'm glad I did. I thought I was throwing a tantrum over this but they told me that it's okay that I'm feeling this way and that my anger is valid, which I appreciated a lot. I tend to minimize my own feelings without even noticing, and I know I shouldn't but my environment and the people surrounding me don't really help to the case. But that's okay. I still have the privacy to let myself Feel alone in my room. When I come out I won't be affected by that anymore and I will be someone new.
THis is gonna sound so corny when I wake up tomorrow and read this again lol
I hope tomorrow goes better and I get some stuff done. Let's all have a good weekend and heal.